David Miliband is optimistic about a potential Burnham government. This is the same David Miliband who, as foreign secretary, helped architect the Libya intervention—a decision so catastrophically executed that it became the textbook example of how to destabilise an entire region while maintaining excellent posture and eye contact.
His endorsement of Andy Burnham’s “openness and energy” is the political equivalent of praising a surgeon’s bedside manner while he’s holding the wrong scalpel. Yes, Burnham seems pleasant. Yes, he has energy. These are not obstacles to disaster—they are its most effective delivery mechanism.
History’s worst decisions were rarely made by scowling villains in darkened rooms. They were made by well-intentioned people with firm handshakes and a genuine belief that they were fixing things. Napoleon was charismatic. So was the guy who decided to invade Russia. Optimism is not a policy framework; it’s a mood ring that makes catastrophe feel like progress.
The Burnham government will smile while making choices that haunt the country for a decade. They’ll do it with such warmth and such conviction that half the population will mistake confidence for competence. Miliband’s optimism isn’t reassuring—it’s a warning label in a foreign secretary’s handwriting.
At least when things fall apart, we’ll all go down grinning.