Twenty-one celebrities walked into a Scottish castle. Seven walked out to the final. Nobody has ever been so proud of losing a game to a cardboard shield. The BBC’s second series of The Celebrity Traitors reached its climax on Friday, and the nation tuned in with the focus usually reserved for ministers testifying about their own pensions. The stakes were a cash pot and the right to be recognised in a supermarket for a fortnight. The contestants lied to each other’s faces for weeks. They whispered in corridors, pointed fingers at people who had done nothing, and cried on cue about friendships that existed only because a camera was present. Every betrayal was hailed as iconic, which is the word television uses when it has run out of ideas. Meanwhile, the actual world kept running its own show with considerably higher stakes. Nobody voted anyone off a rooftop over the state of the NHS waiting list or the cost of a month’s rent. Those betrayals happen in committee rooms, with better lighting and no tears. The final reveal was staged as a seismic moment. The lights dimmed, the music swelled, and a presenter with the expression of a man reading a hostage tape announced the verdict. The audience gasped on schedule. The celebrity who lost had to smile through it and thank the production team. That is the most honest piece of acting in the entire series. The show’s social media team has already posted a teaser for series three. It features a shadowy figure, a dramatic sting, and the words ‘Trust No One’. Somewhere, a minister is reading that caption and wondering why he never got a sting.